Any College Student

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

It is maddening when the court lets guilty criminals go free

As an impoverished middle-class college student, I have several goals for the summer. One of the top goals is to make money. Now, I have a job I could return to as a waitress at a pretty nice casual dining establishment, but waitressing is VERY stressful and that place in particular makes me feel somewhat talentless. In addition, hours are pretty unstable and despite the possibility of getting really good tip money, I'd prefer a predictable, full-time schedule.

Anyhow, after inquiring around, one of my friends said the place she works at is hiring full-time positions. She told me to apply online, so today I shimmied over to my computer and filled out the incredibly long and tedious application. Not that I'm complaining. Well, there was a completely superfluous 37-page question section. It entailed answering each statement with Strongly Disagree, Disagree, Agree, or Strongly Agree. Now, I can see how that would be useful if the questions were things like "I would not take a morning shift" or "I don't like working for you." However, about half of the questions were oh-so subtle statements about leadership and customer service. Things like, "I have no problem talking back to customers" and "I am usually a leader in a group." Seriously, guys. Now you know you can just answer with politically correct statements or whatever you think will make you look like a good candidate for the job. But sometimes... a completely irrelevant statement showed up, like this gem:

"It is maddening when the court lets guilty criminals go free"

Does this have anything to do with being a cashier? With shelving books or serving cappucinos? You're right, it does. Obviously they're making sure if I serve a guilty criminal I will still treat them with the utmost respect. And I will. Because I hide my feelings and true opinions like a big girl.

6 Comments:

  • You're right, waitressing is beyond STRESSFUL. I just applied at a bookstore earlier today.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 7:08 PM  

  • Ha.
    I just filled one of those out as well. I found it quietly infuriating. I felt as though it blurred the lines between literal and figurative: Do you like to be alone? Agree. Do you like being in the middle of a crowd? Agree.
    Wait a minute. How is this being received?
    What are "They" deducing about my innermost motivations?
    I just didn't enjoy the notion that a massive corporation was quantifying and qualifying everything I said, attempting to shove me into a box that is easy for a bureaucracy to consume.
    What made it worse was that the time limit was running out on the public computer, so I was answering the questions as fast as possible.
    Needless to say, I got the job.
    Namaste.

    By Blogger JJJ, at 7:14 PM  

  • Those online applications are crazy! Like they are really going to know what kind of person you are by reading your yes and no answers to their generic questions. It's funny though, so many companies are using them now. I moved to a new town, in a new state, and of course went out to look for jobs, I filled out... oh, I dont know... 8 online applications... and do you think I got a call back from ANY of them? Noooo... Of course not. I did get a call back from the places I filled out paper applications though... hmmm... go figure. :)

    By Blogger Ashley, at 7:57 PM  

  • I'm actually in the middle of filling one of these Unicru applications out right now. Out of boredom, I Googled that question which has made me giggle on previous apps, to see who else has commented on it.

    I think that the worst part of these applications is the fact that just before taking the "personality" portion of the application (with more questions than any final exam), is the fact that before you start, it states that they won't affect your chances of being hired.

    This is a dead lie.

    I applied at a local GameStop a while back. Didn't get the job, for reasons I won't go into. So, for fun, I applied again, but gave honest answers on the personality test (something you should NEVER do), and called GameStop a few days later. He said, and I quote, "Sorry, but I can't hire you. You scored in the red on the personality test, and the system will not let me hire you if I wanted to."

    Also, I wish that Unicru would let you save a "profile" on their service or something, since just about every other company does their online apps through Unicru. It'd save me countless hours from filling out just the personality test, alone.

    By Blogger D14BL0, at 12:17 PM  

  • Yeah D14bl0 is right. I worked at Target for 9 months and my boss told me that you can't even be considered unless you pass the personality test. In fact, you won't even appear in the queue for potential hires.

    By Blogger JeremyD, at 2:19 AM  

  • Ha, thanks for that.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 8:25 PM  

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