Some people are cheap and Jewish. I think that was pretty redundant.
A certain friend of mine has 2 ipods. I have been in desperate WANT of an ipod for a few weeks now, and was elated to hear of this. Because, y'know. Well, you DO know, don't you?
But that didn't work out. She's Jewish.
Me: can i have one of your ipods?
Jew: haah no
Me: why do you need 2?
Jew: in case i want to make you feel poo'
Me: :(
Jew: haha
Me: dont you mean po'?
Me: i'll pay you
Jew: how much?
Me: how much is it worth?
Jew: 175
Me: now, since i'm not really one for BARTERING, what is the LOWEST price you would accept for it?
Me: non-cash payments are also being considered.
Jew: haha
Jew: don't be a tease
Me: HEY
Me: i did NOT say anything about sex
Jew: 170
Jew: 165ish
Me: dude
Me: you're so jewish
Jew: iPods cost 200
Me: you said it's WORTH 175
Jew: yeah
Jew: it's used
Me: right.
Me: if you worked at the ipod store, what sort of discount would you get?
Jew: shit, i don't know
Me: now, how much did YOU personally pay for it?
Jew: nothing
Me: right.
Me: hence, jewish.
Jew: hence smart
Me: in a hot way of course.
Me: but why would it make sense for you to jew me out of $170?
Jew: iono
Me: then why would you do that?
Jew: why not make money/
Me: because you dont need to and because your making money will set me back money that you didnt get set back in the first place. you will be making over $100 off something you never bought in the first place
Jew: :D
Me: i fail to see the joy here.
Well... obviously we're both Jewish here. She wants to make money, I don't want to lose money. But come ON. COME on! COME ON!!!! Support me. Pedro offers you his protection (and so much more).
**Disclaimer: this post in no way is meant to reveal my anti-semetic character. Can't we all just get along?
But that didn't work out. She's Jewish.
Me: can i have one of your ipods?
Jew: haah no
Me: why do you need 2?
Jew: in case i want to make you feel poo'
Me: :(
Jew: haha
Me: dont you mean po'?
Me: i'll pay you
Jew: how much?
Me: how much is it worth?
Jew: 175
Me: now, since i'm not really one for BARTERING, what is the LOWEST price you would accept for it?
Me: non-cash payments are also being considered.
Jew: haha
Jew: don't be a tease
Me: HEY
Me: i did NOT say anything about sex
Jew: 170
Jew: 165ish
Me: dude
Me: you're so jewish
Jew: iPods cost 200
Me: you said it's WORTH 175
Jew: yeah
Jew: it's used
Me: right.
Me: if you worked at the ipod store, what sort of discount would you get?
Jew: shit, i don't know
Me: now, how much did YOU personally pay for it?
Jew: nothing
Me: right.
Me: hence, jewish.
Jew: hence smart
Me: in a hot way of course.
Me: but why would it make sense for you to jew me out of $170?
Jew: iono
Me: then why would you do that?
Jew: why not make money/
Me: because you dont need to and because your making money will set me back money that you didnt get set back in the first place. you will be making over $100 off something you never bought in the first place
Jew: :D
Me: i fail to see the joy here.
Well... obviously we're both Jewish here. She wants to make money, I don't want to lose money. But come ON. COME on! COME ON!!!! Support me. Pedro offers you his protection (and so much more).
**Disclaimer: this post in no way is meant to reveal my anti-semetic character. Can't we all just get along?
posted by Jen Johnson at
12:27 AM
5 Comments:
Hahahahaha I was gonna ask the Jew if I could have the extra iPod, since I'm such a lazy bitch and don't want to get mine fixed, but I knew it would be a futile effort to try and get it for free.
If it were me, I would sell it to someone only if none of my close friends wanted it. Regular friends? Fuck off. Acquaintances? Don't even talk to me.
By
Anonymous, at 8:50 AM
I really love using the word "Jew" as a verb. It holds a special place in my heart. Like, it just makes me feel all warm inside. Not many things can melt my icicle heart- but saying "Don't jew me out of $170" does it for me.
By
Anonymous, at 5:32 PM
Here's the thing. Apple products are for people with money.
Example 1) Me.
Example 2) Granny.
Example 3) Paris Hilton
Example 4) Ian
Example 5) Malcolm
Now occasionally poor people like Anju will end up with Apple products.
I am snobby about my apple products. I won't let anyone just have it for free. So, yeah. I might be Jewish, but I'm not a fucking retard. Get a job and buy your own.
By
Ripsy, at 5:38 PM
I wasn't asking for it for free. You offered it for $5-10 less than it was worth and I wasn't going to go for that.
I HAVE a job. I prefer to spend my money on things like food.
In addition, my commentary on this post was sarcastic. It was meant to be funny. Note that I called MYSELF Jewish, too. There's no need to be an asshole. Get yourself a sense of humor.
By
Jen Johnson, at 11:10 PM
Look Jew, you've told countless people not to Jew you on countless occasions. (Countless possibly because drugs have caused a massive loss of memory on my part.) I'm just saying all Jewish people are cheap.
"Haggle properly. This isn't worth nineteen."
"You just said it was worth twenty."
"Burt!"
"I'll give you ten."
"That's more like it. Ten?! Are you trying to insult me? Me? With a poor dying grandmother... Ten?!"
By
Anonymous, at 12:49 AM
Post a Comment
<< Home